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Some people avoid relationships because they’re afraid that someone else will hurt them. Other people avoid relationships because they want to be independent and not rely on anyone for anything. Whatever the reason, it may be hard for us to break out of a bad relationship pattern. However, some small changes in our behaviors can make all the difference in the world.
Here are ten tips to avoid sabotaging a relationship:
1. Stop trying to control your partner.
Controlling is a major cause of misery in relationships and you can’t fix it by controlling your partner in more ways. You need to stop trying to control your partner and start trusting that their decisions will be good ones for them and for you both.
Just like we try to control our own lives, our partners need to trust that we’ll be on their side as much as possible, even if we don’t understand what they’re doing or saying. If you focus on the things that are going wrong in the relationship, you will make it worse instead of better.
2. Stay present with your partner during a conflict.
One thing I often hear from my clients is that they can’t stop thinking about what happened during an argument. They replay the conversation in…